Friday, 4 January 2008
All Saints, but no angels
Cheating in football takes place both on and off the field. On the field, of course, a player can take a dive to deceive the referee into awarding a penalty. And far from being frowned upon, this is now almost officially approved of.
Only this week on Match of the Day – the flagship football programme of the national public service broadcaster – a Middlesbrough forward was criticised for not cheating a penalty when the chance presented itself. "He could have been a bit clever there," said Alan Hansen, prompting an alarmed Gary Lineker to hurriedly praise the player's honesty and head off a BBC scandal that would have pushed Queenie-huff-gate and Phone-in-rip-off-gate firmly into the shade.
And if the powers that be are too weak to punish cheating on the field of play, they seem similarly unwilling or unable to deal properly with dishonesty off the pitch. Whoever said cheats never prosper reckoned without the football authorities' cowardice in declining to take firm measures against clubs who have blown on the windy side of the law – or whose approach to accountancy has been a little too creative.
Just as some Chesterfield fans refer lamely to a nearby rival as "Mans-failed", some other supporters have rechristened the Derbyshire side "Cheaterfield". This refers to the 2001 inquiry into irregularities at Saltergate surrounding transfer fees, payments to players and the reporting of attendance figures. (It's just a coincidence that Nicky Law was in charge at the time; by the time he arrived at Grimsby there were hardly any transfer fees, payments to players and attendances left to misreport.)
The Football League fined Chesterfield a crippling £20,000 and docked them a whole nine points – just enough to make sure they still got promoted. A year later Boston United's points deduction for similar misdemeanours was carried over to the following season – which made sure they still got promoted. And by the time the FA got round to punishing West Ham for the Tevez thing last season, they said it was too late to deduct points (it would have been "unfair on their fans", apparently: never mind about Watford's, Charlton's and Sheffield United's). So they stayed in the Premier League and will receive around £45m in TV money this season alone. I'd say that's fairly prosperous, wouldn't you?
And the last time Town visited Saltergate, in March 2004, Chesterfield won two penalties by "being a bit clever" and stole a 4-4 draw. At the end of the season they finished one point ahead of Town – staying up in the third division at our expense.
Many a Grimbarian, then, has already concluded that the spire at St Mary's and All Saints church isn't the only thing that's crooked around those parts. Still, at least Alan Hansen would approve.
Only this week on Match of the Day – the flagship football programme of the national public service broadcaster – a Middlesbrough forward was criticised for not cheating a penalty when the chance presented itself. "He could have been a bit clever there," said Alan Hansen, prompting an alarmed Gary Lineker to hurriedly praise the player's honesty and head off a BBC scandal that would have pushed Queenie-huff-gate and Phone-in-rip-off-gate firmly into the shade.
And if the powers that be are too weak to punish cheating on the field of play, they seem similarly unwilling or unable to deal properly with dishonesty off the pitch. Whoever said cheats never prosper reckoned without the football authorities' cowardice in declining to take firm measures against clubs who have blown on the windy side of the law – or whose approach to accountancy has been a little too creative.
Just as some Chesterfield fans refer lamely to a nearby rival as "Mans-failed", some other supporters have rechristened the Derbyshire side "Cheaterfield". This refers to the 2001 inquiry into irregularities at Saltergate surrounding transfer fees, payments to players and the reporting of attendance figures. (It's just a coincidence that Nicky Law was in charge at the time; by the time he arrived at Grimsby there were hardly any transfer fees, payments to players and attendances left to misreport.)
The Football League fined Chesterfield a crippling £20,000 and docked them a whole nine points – just enough to make sure they still got promoted. A year later Boston United's points deduction for similar misdemeanours was carried over to the following season – which made sure they still got promoted. And by the time the FA got round to punishing West Ham for the Tevez thing last season, they said it was too late to deduct points (it would have been "unfair on their fans", apparently: never mind about Watford's, Charlton's and Sheffield United's). So they stayed in the Premier League and will receive around £45m in TV money this season alone. I'd say that's fairly prosperous, wouldn't you?
And the last time Town visited Saltergate, in March 2004, Chesterfield won two penalties by "being a bit clever" and stole a 4-4 draw. At the end of the season they finished one point ahead of Town – staying up in the third division at our expense.
Many a Grimbarian, then, has already concluded that the spire at St Mary's and All Saints church isn't the only thing that's crooked around those parts. Still, at least Alan Hansen would approve.
Labels: bbc, boston, cheating, chesterfield, corruption, diving, hansen, law, lineker, match of the day, west ham
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]