The Ballad of Phil Jevons Jevons is a forward signed by Grimsby Town from Everton in 2001. He didn't score many goals to start with and seemed to lose his way a bit, and then Town stopped playing him (partly because they'd have to pay Everton more money once he made a certain number of appearances), so in that sense this song is slightly unfair, because if he didn't always look very interested then circumstances were against him as well. The song is partly about my hypocrisy for thinking he was lazy when I'm the laziest bastard going. Anyway, when Town looked set for a second successive relegation they put him back in the team as a last resort and he suddenly started scoring a lot, but not enough to keep us up, and he left on a Bosman after a horrible defeat at Tranmere in May 2004. To start with I just wrote the song to amuse my fellow Grimsby-supporting mates, and never intended it for public performance because I didn't think it'd mean anything to anyone. But then I thought: hmm, well, the enigmatic, gifted-but-lazy footballer is sort of an everyman figure really. Then I thought: hmm, and it's quite a nice melody so it'd be a shame to waste it, and if people don't get it, tough titty! How can I object to you A Scouser's work is never done And you and me are just a pair of slackers Four grand a week with bonuses You shrugged your shoulders as the Mariners went down |
I
want to listen to the song please Mr Pete I want to go back to the songs page |